In interest of full disclosure, I love to drink.  I am in no way an unbiased party when discussing alcohol and alcohol consumption.  Happy hour is not just a phrase, it’s the happiest hour of my day.

While I find it difficult to dislike Oprah Winfrey overall, her love of pseudoscience has often grated and seemed dangerous. And now, Oprah’s love of pseudoscience has killed three people and left nearly two dozen others needing serious medical help. And that’s a little more serious.

Self-help expert and author James Arthur Ray had rented the Angel Valley Retreat Center for his five-day “Spiritual Warrior” event that culminated in a sweat lodge ceremony.

Are you a patriotic militia member that’s fighting Barack Obama’s illegal communist regime that’s forcing the U.S. into a tyrannical New World Order that will enslave us all? Are you in a band?

WASHINGTON — In a press conference by the nation’s business leaders and a smattering of government officials, it was announced that everything bought over the past seven years has been immediately recalled, and that all personal information held by all businesses had been lost.

So last Sunday I was thinking: could Chris Berman be a political talking head in this country? And would he be any worse than the natterers on cable news, or the morning shows? I mean, Berman is clearly a silly and shallow blowhard, but that never stopped Tim Russert.

My suspicion, fully borne out this week by l'affaire Limbaugh, is that sports are treated far more seriously in this country than politics are, especially by our media. That a comment on the state of our political press and on our national priorities.

In early August, I began working on a book to document a growing sense of paranoia among right-wing conservatives. At the time, the media was fairly quiet on the subject. With the exception of liberal blogs (ahem), no one paid much attention to the wild rhetoric of the tea parties and occasional paranoid outbursts from commentators like Rush Limbaugh and politicians like Michelle Bachman.

TUPELO, Miss. — It was a day of happiness at the Johnson household today, as youngest son Timmy, 4, was named chief operating officer of the SEC enforcement division.

“We always knew Timmy would do great things,” said his mother, Sandra Johnson. “He’s always been really good with numbers.”

Just because Louisiana Justice of the Peace Keith Bardwell refuses to let interracial couples marry doesn't mean that he's a racist. He just doesn't believe in "mixing the races that way," which raises the question, in what way does he believe in mixing the races? Native American-Tibetan? They both have a brownish hue and wear colorful traditional costumes, so maybe that's OK. Or perhaps he means that the races can mix in other ways. They can be bridge partners, for instance.

FORT COLLINS, Colo. — A homemade helium weather balloon got loose from the Republican National Committee headquarters today, leading authorities on a cross-country chase after Republicans insisted that their plans for health care reform were on board.

“All of our plans, like tort reform, just took off and flew away,” said RNC Chairman Michael Steele. “I don’t know how they got in there, but our plans are now up in the air. Including tort reform.”

Abraham the wandering Jew moved south again to the Negev, where he frequently visited the city of Gerar in the land of the Philistines.

Commentary: The Great Rabbi Ezekiel Bezekiel has written, "The Torah does not say why Abraham visited Gerar, but doubtless it was for a holy purpose known to God." Holy purpose my hairy Hebrew hiney. Read on, friends, read on.

We all love bacon, that’s not to dispute, but has this country gone overboard in it’s zeal for bacon?  I asked the almighty Google and the answer was a resounding yes in the form of the amazing amount of bacon related products that are available.  Below are just a few pictures of images found when one googles “bacon.”
 

Where I’m from “bacon briefcase,” has a different meaning.
 

According to a new book entitled Ghosts Caught on Film 2, a photograph taken in front of Jim Morrison’s tomb in Paris shows the ghost of Jim Morrison; you can tell it’s him be cause the ghost looks sexy and brooding.   Predictably, paranormal websites are treating this photo as proof of the existence of ghosts. Equally predictably, this raises my ire.

While President Obama's recent Nobel Peace Prize has been attracting media attention, he has been quietly reaping a number of other prizes, including the New York Marathon, the Heisman Trophy, Best Cooking Blog, Sikh Man of the Year, and West Duluth High School's Most Likely to Succeed.

KISS THE DOLLAR GOODBYE

So, perhaps you've heard the buzz about a shiny, new compromise compromise in the battle for healthcare reform reform.  First, there was the notion of single-payer.  Of course, this proved to be far too unpalatable for anyone to the right of Dennis Kucinich, so then we were given the notion of the public option.  This would create a Medicare-style system for anyone who wanted to buy in.  It was certainly a compromise, but the merits of the compromise, as well as the general notion, were clear - it's publicly run and anyone can opt in.  Public.  Option.

OKLAHOMA CITY - A new law set to come into effect on Nov. 1, will require all men in Oklahoma to reveal personal details regarding every sperm that they murder.

“Every year in Oklahoma, a googolplex of sperm die lonely deaths inside socks, in showers and other places,” said Oklahoma spokeswoman Sally Kern. “This holocaust of the unborn must end.”

So, have you heard about President Obama winning the Nobel Prize? If you'd suggested this to me yesterday, I wouldn't have believed it, let alone been able to put forth an argument for it, so I won't pretend it made intuitive sense when I woke up this morning.

Okay, so we're not really bombing the moon, as some of the more sensational headlines have indicated.  We're trying to find out more about the water that might be there.  However, this did remind me of one of my favorite sketches from Mr. Show.  Submitted for your approval: