Doctor Cleveland's picture

    The Arizona "Immigration" Law

    Let's be clear about one thing: the Arizona immigration law signed by Governor Janice Brewer this week is not about illegal immigrants. It is about arresting legal immigrants and about American citizens. Because it makes not having your documents on you a crime.

    Deadman's picture

    Lucky: A lesson on living, loving and loss.

    My brother put his 18-year-old dog to sleep yesterday.

    My sadness today is profound, almost overwhelming, and I am trying to figure out why.

    Obviously, the dog himself, a terribly sweet, ridiculously cute cocker-beagle mix, is the primary reason. He was my brother's dog -  there's no denying that - but he was really my first pet as well, my roommate and companion for the nine-plus years I lived with my brother after college.

    Larry Jankens's picture

    Let's Go Out to the Movies: Movie Trailer Reviews: VIDEOS

    If you are like me you have been fooled by movie trailers too many times. I’ll see a movie trailer and think to myself, “Hey that kinda seems cool, I’ll go see that in theaters,” and then go to the theaters and be severely disappointed. Or I’ll see a movie trailer and think to myself “Hey that seems like a flaming piece of crap that I will never waste my time on,” and then I’ll see the movie and it will actually be good.
    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Doctor refuses KFC Double-Down Sandwich as payment for treatment

    LOUISVILLE – Billy-Bob Wolfrum was pleased that Dr. McBride had removed the tick from the bottom of his foot, that had given him so much trouble. Wolfrum was much less pleased when Dr. Mkfc  double-downcBride refused the KFC Double-Down Sandwich for treatment.

    Orlando's picture

    Boobquake: Let's Do Our Part for Science

    I know that I'm the only one at Dagblog in possession of actual boobs (not counting Wolfrum's third nipple) but I hope the Dagboys and all of our esteemed readers will join (by participating or in solidarity) in a potentially earth-shattering scientific experiment on Monday, April 26th that has been termed "Boobquake."

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    How I came to Dominate DagBlog by William K. Wolfrum

    Hey kids, it's me, Bill. I hope you like the headline to this post, as it will be coming in book form soon. And not the Genghis translation of soon, which equals 14 weeks. He's like a Brazilian that way.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Ben Roethlisberger's one chance to stay with Pittsburgh Steelers

    Now that the NFL has decreed that un-litigated rape is worthy a four-to-six-week suspension along with a “comprehensive behavioral evaluation by professionals,” the future of Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger is becoming slightly clearer.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    President Barack Obama To Win Landslide Re-Election in 2012

    It’s April 20, 2010, and let me call it now – President Barack Obama will easily win re-election in 2012. Any discussion you hear about the 2012 presidential election is just a way to wile away the hours between the next Lindsay Lohan and/or Kim Kardashian news.

    There’s three indisputable reasons to call this race so early:

    1) The economy will be better in 2011 than it is now.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Pope Benedict XVI takes over at Goldman Sachs

    NEW YORK/ROME — Catholic Pope Benedict XVI has taken over all responsibilities at troubled Goldman Sachs, today. His new title will be Chief Holy Authority (CFA) or just “Pope.”

    The Pope will keep his duties with the Catholic Church while working simultaneously at Goldman Sachs. The Pope stated he saw no problems for the giant financial firm that is currently in trouble with the SEC.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    The William K. Wolfrum promise – I will never purposefully vomit on you

    Easily the best thing about being a blogger is the ability to control your image. I know there are many bloggers out there who will scream “I keep it real,” but won’t mention the time and details necessary for said realness.

    Myself, for instance. I come off much nicer as a blogger than as a person. And to be honest, it’s not like I come off all that nice as a blogger. I suppose what I’m getting at here, is that I want you all to know more about me.

    I’ve been to jail but not prison.

    I may have committed consensual sodomy in Texas at a time it was illegal.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Man accused of vomiting on girl at game is a Conservative Tea Partier

    Recently,  Matthew Clemmens, 21, of Cherry Hill, N.J., was charged with assault, reckless endangerment, disorderly conduct and other offenses because he chose to show his displeasure to an 11-year-old girl by vomiting on her in the stands at a Philadelphia Phillies’ game.

    Now, while I’m sure Philadelphia management is smart enough to warn children that they have no responsibility over intentional vomit attacks, that’s neither here nor there.

    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Patriots' Day Follow-up (Boston Marathon)

    2:05:52? You've got to be kidding me! 2:08:41 is only good for fourth place?

    That's amazing. Two American men run sub 2:10 marathons, and that gets them fourth and fifth? Tough, tough race.

    Let me say congratulations to Robert Cheruiyot the Younger for absolutely smashing the Boston course record set by his namesake, Robert Cheruiyout  the Slightly Older. That's an amazing achievement, and a great day for Boston and for sport. Congratulations are also in order for women's champ Teyba Erkesso, in her first Boston ever. Well done!

    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Defending the Constitution (from the Birthers)

    Today, as everybody who's ever lived in Boston knows, is Patriots' Day, the anniversary of the Battles of Lexington and Concord. That means that it's a holiday in Massachusetts and Maine, and it means that today is Boston Marathon day. (Go, Meb and Ryan! Go!) My beloved Red Sox are playing a morning game in Fenway, and all is right with my world.

    Larry Jankens's picture

    Facebook Rejection Letter: Why Click "Ignore" When You Can Tell Them How You Really Feel?


    This is an email I’m planning to send to this guy who we will call “Phil” who sent me a friendship request on Facebook.  If you have any suggestions on a better way to word my displeasure, do share - you’ll have to trust me that this guy deserves to be talked to like this.

    Dear Phil,


    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Why the Catholic Church Will Not Save Itself

    Every month, every week, the Catholic Church's scandal seems to deepen. Andrew Sullivan wants the Pope to resign. Christopher Hitchens wants the Pope arrested. Peggy Noonan has a brilliant column detailing the Catholic hierarchy's inability to grasp the problem and calling for "new blood" in the leadership. These are all reasonable desires. But none of that will happen.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Michele Bachmann claims dogs are demons, Jesus is her hair dresser; All this & John McCain on Meet the Press

    Rep. Michele Bachmann’s (R-MN), known for her invented attacks on President Barack Obama, today announced that Hollywood is one big Hitler, that adorable little dogs are demons and that Jesus Christ does her hair.

    "He is just so good," said Bachmann.

    Thus will all be discussed next week, along with an exclusive 20-minute interview with John McCain while he bottle feeds a baby deer, next week on Meet the Press.


    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Rape is Rape - it is not a clever political metaphor

    It is astounding that in the Year 2010, so many people still treat the word rape as if it’s a clever description from everything from taxes to actions at sporting events. The pictured cartoon made the rounds on the heels of the passage of health care reform. At seemingly all levels in the world of politics, many consider “rape” to be a true conversational gem:

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Only Chuck Norris Can Make Supreme Court Less Liberal

    When Connecticut Senator Joe Lieberman recently stated that President Barack Obama needed to nominate a more conservative justice to fill the vacancy created by the resignation of Justice John Paul Stevens, many liberals blanched. After all, the U.S.


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