Shame is, variously, an affect, emotion, cognition, state, or condition. The roots of the word shame are thought to derive from an older word meaning to cover; as such, covering oneself, literally or figuratively, is a natural expression of shame.[1] Wikipedia

"A man should never be ashamed to own that he has been in the wrong, which is but saying... that he is wiser today than yesterday." Swift

"Pride attaches undue importance to the superiority of one's status in the eyes of others; And shame is fear of humiliation at one's inferior status in the estimation of others. When one sets his heart on being highly esteemed, and achieves such rating, then he is automatically involved in fear of losing his status." Tao Te Ching

Acting is half shame, half glory. Shame at exhibiting yourself, glory when you can forget yourself.
John Gielgud

As soon as you forbid something, you make it extraordinarily appealing. You also bring shame in as a phenomenon.  John Sturges

Doubt is the brother of shame.   Erik Erickson

Hard work without talent is a shame, but talent without hard work is a tragedy.  Robert Half

False shame accompanies a man that is poor, shame that either harms a man greatly or profits him; shame is with poverty, but confidence with wealth.  Hesiod

What is the seal of attained freedom? -No longer being ashamed in front of oneself. Frederich Nietzsche

Shame is the leading cause of death of the potential for actualizing giftedness. Maria Rocomara

Victims may be defensive, submissive, over-accommodating to others, passive-aggressive in conflict, dependent on others for self-worth, overly sensitive, even manipulative. They're often angry, resentful, and envious, feeling unworthy or ashamed about their circumstances. Have you ever felt or acted this way? David Emerald

I AM ASHAMED

Oh I feel shame for the loss of a career, for not being able to help my children, for not somehow picking myself up and accomplishing something.

Blind people, deaf people, people without all of their limbs, people in constant pain.....I have witnessed these people in person and on TV and at the library 'overcome' their 'issues' and contribute so much.

I am ashamed I have gotten fat again. I am ashamed that I earn no money by the sweat of my brow. I am ashamed that my clothes could not possibly make me look worse, as if that were possible.

But this talk is about a different kind of shame.  Two of our members, regular members are in a lot of pain.  Many more really, but I focused on the homeless in my last blog that ended up being directed to them from so many of my friends today.  And there are others who are suffering soooooo much every day.

My friend 'R' wrote about losing everything as they say and yet found some friends, rels to live with for awhile.

I told him I found myself here, in this apartment; sleeping on the floor for three or four months in front of a b&w tv-- all seven inches of it. Eventually some friends and family brought me a bed that was being thrown out, a number of my old books, eventually a larger tv......

My shame after reading this blog came from looking around my quarters and seeing squalor. I would not want anyone to visit me here. I cleaned up, cleaned the bathroom, the kitchen floor, bundled up some garbage. Moved a few things.

I keep this up, it might look like a human being lives here by Friday. Ha!!!

Some shame is good. Do not you wish Bolton, or Cheney or w actually experienced some shame once in awhile. Shame can urge us on when we are not caught in some continuous bog of depression.

Another friend of mine asked me how come I am so prolific when he/she is afraid to blog.  What will people say? Will they like the product?

Read my blogs, and half of them could shame a tenth grader after handing in a crumpled essay to his English Teacher.  For some reason most of that shame has gone away.

Do you realize that there are some shrinks right now that would see my writing as some sort of evil sickness that must be addressed?  People who need to write everyday. It is now a syndrome.  And yet I just watched Stewart speak with a Teddy Roosevelt biographer--150,000 letters issued by Teddy. Hahaha A lot more substance in those communiqués, no doubt.  Used to be a strong push for people in this country to write to others.  Jefferson even invented his own copy machine so he could reach more readers. Hahahaha

So I address my friend who is worried about failure. As far as I am concerned this Café is a writing lab.  Once in a great while a commenter will say:

Hey quit this ee cummings bullshit and capitalize your sentence openers, use proper punctuation and look up some words, once in awhile. Hahahaha

Most of the readers whom I know around here, are looking to 'message'...looking to actually meet someone...looking to learn something.

But my friend began here cleverly. Commenting after reading a blog; instead of just skimming it like I do once in awhile.

Oh, and rec's and such....Q could blog every day and reach the top most of the time. He has no interest in this at all. Hahahahaha  All he would have to do is just cut and paste a comment or two and call it a blog.  Grouch does not even care about blogging and is one of our most prolific readers and commenters.

Back to Shame. It is when our depression is so deep that shame becomes like a sharp knife in our sides. When it just adds to the mess we find ourselves in. See, I can end my sentences in prepositions and not have the least shame about it. Hahahahaha

Do those on 'the outside' need daily therapy and pills? Some of us do. But other of us, we need to communicate with others and just see what they are thinking and feeling. Ultimately, we might even get out of ourselves once in awhile and digest the meal presented by another.

I just saw a lot of talk about shame today. Shame over condition and loss and inability to act.

Not real truth like the Tao might present in this post.

It just made me ponder....