William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Newt Gingrich and Tim Tebow: Winning ugly and heading toward defeat

    As of this very moment, there are two men that are dominating the news – and both of them are just awful at their chosen professions. But amazingly enough, we are all witnessing mediocrity rise to incredible heights as a lousy NFL quarterback is leading his team to victories while a lousy politician is leading the race for the GOP nomination for President.

    Yes, my friends, with Newt Gingrich and Tim Tebow, America is putting its worst foot forward and getting a chance to enjoy the fruits of lousiness. And while the two are incredibly different in many ways, there are some striking similarities to their current runs of success.

    Unexamined, both Tebow and Gingrich look like winners. Tebow has led the Denver Broncos to six victories in seven games, often pulling off miracle comebacks to get the job done. Gingrich has managed to become the consensus front-runner of the race to the GOP nomination, despite having his campaign all but die at birth.

    There is one simple reason for the duo’s success, however – an incredible lack of competition. Tebow’s six victories have come against teams with a combined 29-42 record, with none of them resembling a playoff team.

    For Gingrich, his race to the top of the GOP comes against an even worse field. Keep in mind, Herman Cain was the GOP front-runner only a scant few weeks ago. Donald Trump has spent time on top of the polls. For the most part, Gingrich has ascended to the top for one main reason – his name isn’t Mitt Romney.

    Thus, the current successes of Gingrich and Tebow have mostly come in spite of themselves. Gingrich is no doubt an experienced politician, but his barrage of affairs and divorces make Kim Kardashian look like a spokesperson for successful marriage. Add to that the fact that he is more of a flip-flopper on issues than Romney, as well as his bizarre, angry white guy proclamations – such as his latest push of ending child labor laws because poor children have no one around them that has a work ethic – and it becomes clear that Gingrich is not just out of touch with modern America, he’s not even within shouting distance.

    And while Tebow is obviously a very talented athlete, his quarterbacking abilities are abysmal. He has virtually no field vision and the passing game obviously moves far too fast for him to react. He often looks like a punter trying to make a throw on a trick play rather than a starting quarterback. And while it’s worked thus far against mediocre competition, an option quarterback just has no place in the modern NFL.

    Keep in mind, the differences between the two are greater than the similarities. Tebow is a likable young man who is earnest in his religious beliefs. He has natural leadership skills – make no mistake, the Broncos have become a better football team solely due to him.

    Gingrich, on the other hand, is about as unlikable a person as exists in America today. His religious beliefs – he’s a Catholic now, by the way – are completely transparent and self-serving. His leadership abilities have wrecked his own party and created political discourse that makes schoolyard taunting look like an MIT lecture. The GOP is a worse party, solely due to him.

    In the end, we are currently watching a lousy quarterback win NFL games and a lousy politician lead the GOP field. But one thing can be said with the utmost certainty – both Gingrich and Tebow will see their seasons end in humiliating defeat.


    Crossposted at William K. Wolfrum Chronicles


    Let's come back and refer to this article at the end of the season - armchair quarterback

    Depends upon what your definition of "season" is. 

    I'm not that big of a fan of Gingrich but this article completely lacks substance. It reads like a high school paper, making a loose comparison between a football player and a political candidate without actually talking about the candidate's stances. It's hilarious that you attack Gingrich for what he's done to the political discourse in an article like this. I'd be ashamed to put my name and image on such childish tripe. I feel bad for you because you think you're a serious political commentator but you're just another rabid attack dog blogger. Look in the mirror and think about the way you're acting.

    Anonymous, I think that you're a little confused. This is a rabid attack dog blogger:

    And this is a serious political commentator:


    Ok. Shit just got real.

    Is that Tebow?

    In Brazil??

    Holy shit, what a find.


    - Cheesehead in North Cheeseland

    Something about this Qnonymous person smells eerily familiar ...

    Personally, I highly recommend not smelling him…

    I think you just won the high school writing contest. 

    Yup. Pretty much what I thought...garbage in the form of a paragraph.

    Well I aint anonymous and I like this rant. You got me laughing and crying a little.

    I do know that The Newt is in a weak division in a weak conference and he might pull this out.

    And it might piss off Ron Paul to the point of running as a third party candidate making it a three way Superbowl. ha

    Damn, Mr. Day, they just don't get it. You are the man! You are the only rabid attack dog blogger.

    Ugh... and now Newt's gone and kissed the ring.


    I'm interested in finding out if any of you guys almost lost your lunch after reading what came after, "Amid the marble and gold of Trump Tower..."

    They'd be fantastic running mates (with mutual jerking-off benefits.)

    And who is Trump referring to as the 'wrong one'? Mitt "Who Can Be Bullied into Changing His Stance" Romney? 

    Into what bizarro universe have we strayed to find ourselves confronted with donald trump standing in for jim lehrer as a debate moderator?

    "He has virtually no field vision and the passing game obviously moves far too fast for him to react."

    You clearly did not watch his last game. Tebow has never failed at any level of the sport, he's not failing now. This is a ridiculous post with no basis in fact.

    Take 3 minutes of your time and actually watch him play.

    Hey, I just entered a comment and now it says that I'M this annonnymus guy! There is a conspiracy of some kind goin down.

    --the Decider (the annonnymus one, I guess)

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