I called my tax preparer to inquire about the possibility of receiving a tax credit and after he told me "No," he went on to tell me that elitists in Washington--"Obama, Pelosi and Reid" among them, but most Republicans included, too--want to control everything in America.

He called the Washington political corps "Communists, Marxists, Socialists and Nazis" all in the same sentence. If only the markets were allowed free rein, we wouldn't have this recession, which in his view was planned by these folks to take over the free market system.

His teabagger-style rant went on for several minutes while he told me that the federal government should get out of the welfare business and let churches take over.

Mercifully--or so I thought--his monologue was interrupted by a callback from my local welfare office. I l ducked out of his tirade and took the incoming call. The woman on the other end carefully explained why I wasn't getting enough in Food Stamps to actually live on. After my measly $674 a month in SSI is figured into the mix, I'm entitled to no more than $128 a month in FS benefits.

"Maria," I said, "when I was getting $200 a month in Food Stamps, I called several times to have my benefits reduced because it was more than I needed. I ended up giving the excess to churches by purchasing food for their food pantries. So I'm not a dishonest person who takes more than they need to live on."

"Oh, I'm so sorry," she said, giggling as if I were pouting over a lack of cream in my coffee.

I guess I'm supposed to die. That would make the government and my tax preparer happy.

Don't start a fund. I'll survive--somehow. Living will be my revenge.