Ramona's picture

    Me at the Oscars: Fabulous or Fizzle, 60 years and Counting

    When the first televised Academy Awards ceremony took place on March 19, 1953, I, a bedazzled 15-year-old movie fan, sat in front of our black and white TV set, riveted and no doubt pledging to never forget that moment as long as I lived.   Since then I have never (and I mean NEVER) missed a telecast.

    It was the 25th such award ceremony but the first one televised. (“The Greatest Show on Earth” won over “High Noon” and “The Quiet Man”.  Go figure.) Bob Hope was the first TV host and of course we all thought he was just funny enough and perfect for the part.  But year after year he was the host, and, as you might expect, even the great Bob Hope lost his edge.  But I watched.  Every year.  No matter how long into the night they went on, I watched.

    They began televising the awards in color in 1966 but we still had a black and white TV, so I missed seeing it in all its glory until much later. But since movies were still mostly in black and white it wasn’t like we knew what those stars looked like in color, anyway.

    Off the top of my head, here are my highlights over the years:  (I’m doing this without looking anything up; I just want to see what’s still in my memory bank.)

    eva marie saintEva Marie Saint blurting “Oh, shit” into the microphone when she won for “On the Waterfront”.  Big news in the day, that cussing.  Especially coming from a woman and a PG one at that. (Pregnant, but nobody said the word out loud then.  It was always PG.  Or, in certain circles, knocked up.)

    John Huston drunk as a skunk accepting a special award for something.

    The actress in the indian costume un-accepting the award the Academy gave Marlon Brando for some movie.

    A streaker running across the stage, stealing David Niven’s thunder for a second until Niven recovered and commented on the guy’s physique.  I remember it was Niven and not the streaker who got the standing ovation.

    Laurence Olivier giving a speech that made me and almost everyone in the audience cry.  It was splendid.  Jon Voight’s reaction, caught by the camera, is etched into my mind. (I don’t know what happened to that Jon Voight.)

    Sammy Davis Jr.’s last appearance on that stage when everybody, including him, knew he was dying.

    Elizabeth Taylor talking about aids when nobody was talking about it.

    The year “Gandhi” swept the awards, winning almost all the big categories, and Ben Kingley’s speech.  I don’t remember a word of his speech, of course, but watching him up there accepting a most deserved award gave me chills.

    Billy Crystal’s opening bit where he was wheeled on stage wrapped in restraints and hidden behind a Hannibal Lecter mask.  Brilliant.

    Madonna’s astonishing stage fright night, where she sang shakily and off-key and danced as if she’d just had knee surgery.  I almost felt sorry for her.

    Michael Moore talking against the Iraq war.

    Rob Lowe “singing” with Snow White.

    The little Italian actor who leaped over the seats to get to his Oscar.  (See?  I remember that but can’t remember his name.  So much for Oscar antics.)

    I know there are many more if I really thought about it, but that brings me to last night, when Seth McFarlane hosted the 85th Academy Awards ceremony. I watched the entire thing, from the red carpet to the sign-off, and there are a few moments that stand out for me.  Daniel Day-Lewis’s irreverent and funny acceptance speech,  Michelle Obama’s opening of the envelope and announcement of best picture (Argo), Ben Affleck’s not-so-subtle smack at the Academy for snubbing him in the Best Director category.

    The opening bit was–oh, my GOD–so, so, long.  And bad.  Really bad.  Even Captain Kirk couldn’t save it.   It made James Franco’s performance as host in 2011 look just okay, which is, I hate to say, some feat.

    The “We Saw Your Boobs” song might have been funny in a shortened version, but, as with everything in the McFarlane script, it went on into the realm of the interminable.

    The musical performances are what saved the night for me.  Adele, Shirley Bassey, Jennifer Hudson, Barbra Streisand–sublime, those ladies.

    (Notice I’ve left out the last song–the duet between McFarlane  and Kristin Chenowith.  Yes, well. . .)

    But speaking of Franco.  (We were, weren’t we?) this is what I wrote about Franco’s stab at hosting on the morning after that event two years ago:

    If I could have timed my naps to James Franco’s appearances, I would have been almost as happy as I was when “The King’s Speech” won best picture.  I like the guy and I hate to add to the pile-ups on whatever the heck he thought he was doing up there, but man, he was dreadful.  (Anne Hathaway clearly saw she was in the middle of a train wreck and was trying not to panic, but there were moments when I thought she was going to tear off one of her many dresses and run screaming out of the theater.)

    But for Franco, it wasn’t over even when it was over.  He got into a Tweet war with a 20-year-old fellow Yalie (He’s working on a Doctorate in English at Yale), and she posted this about him in her blog:  “Combined with his Oscars hosting performance and in accordance with the opinion of commenter’s [sic] on my last blog, I’m becoming convinced that James Franco’s whole life is a form of postmodern performance art. In that context, his Twitter fits right in.“    Oh, ouch.  That’s harsh.

    Okay, maybe the hardest job in the world is hosting the Oscars.  It shouldn’t be, but considering the fails over the years with talent that should have been talented, I will cut those hosts some slack.  Because I love the Oscars, even when they’re bad.  There is nothing else like them at all.

    I do love the Golden Globes and they’re my second best, as long as Ricky Gervais is nowhere in sight. (I know, I know–you like him; I just find his attempts at out-ickying himself feeble and far from funny.)  I love that everybody can drink at the tables, so that by the end of the night anything can happen.

    oscars-85th-academy-awards-poster

    But this is about the Oscars. Any  thoughts about the Oscars?  I’m all ears.  As you can tell, I can’t get enough of that wonderful stuff.  I’ve been at this for 60 years.  I can’t quit now.

    Comments

    The best thing about the Oscars are the dresses and one of the best things about the internet is that I can see the dresses without watching the Oscars or buying a magazine which is what I did this morning. cheeky

     


    The Oscars are not everybody's cup of tea, for sure, but I'm obsessed with not breaking my attendance record.  Some years that's all I can say good about them.


    The Oscars are great as reality shows go.  I just have a very short attention span that needs more structure than reality usually provides. blush


    I missed the opening and am so out of the mainstream I had no idea who Seth was.

    He seemed good in a bad sort of way; bad in a good sort of way.

    His biggest problem was that his material stank and was offensive here and there.

    But I agree with you that it's hard to host the event. The only hosts I can remember liking were Johnny Carson and Bill Crystal.

    But I've always wondered why the host and the ceremony as a whole are almost always flat. I mean, it's not as if they want for talent out there--writing, acting, stand-up, directing. It should be a real feast.

    Instead, last night, they had fag and Jew jokes--which drew "oohs" as if they were the height of daring and cutting edge--and self-conscious fizzles. Real frat boy stuff. Was that to prove that, despite Hollywood's reputation in the heartland, they are not PC?

    I thought Chris Rock was going to be good, but he couldn't cut it and, as I recall, stooped for a laugh at Jude Law's expense. He would never have become Chris Rock if that had been the level of his material.

    Seth had a sense of what an Oscar host is supposed to be and that gave me hope. But he needs much better material.


    Sorry...did I mean Carson or Hope? One of them two I liked.


    I always thought Johnny Carson was far better than Bob Hope, and Billy Crystal was better than both of them.  I've heard that they ask Crystal to host it every year and sometimes he does and sometimes he doesn't.

    Chris Rock was pretty bad, but McFarlane and Franco should have given him reason to hope everyone had forgotten his performance.

    (I don't know who Seth McFarlane is, either.  In fact I spelled his name "McFarland" until I saw that wasn't right and changed it.)


    From another Oscars review:

     

    "Seth MacFarlane is thirty-nine, and I am—barely—a part of the generation that he’s supposed to be appealing to. But I felt nostalgic last night for the Academy Awards of yore, when I sat on a couch with friends and watched everyone be glamorous and semi-respectable and we got to be gross and snarky. MacFarlane broke through that boundary last night, and suddenly the bitter asshole on the couch was up there on the stage, lost somewhere between a big smile and a sneer."
     

    I have no idea who Seth is.  My boyfriend and I thought he did a decent job of sounding sort of like Sinatra but we didn't listen to the lyrics while he sang. 

    I loved the musical portions of the Awards last night, which is a rare thing, because they usually (in my mind) suck.  Great to see Catherine Zeta-Jones reprise her "All That Jazz" bit, and what a shock to see Barbra walk out on stage to sing "Memories" for Marvin.  Wow. 

    Daniel was a kick to watch, during his speech, bless him.  Made me forgive him for being such a bastid in the Gangs of New York, lol....

    Surprised to see Argo win.  Ben deserves it, I'm sure, but it was a surprise. 

    Haven't a clue who the Best Actress is, but I guess I have to see Playbook now.  Any woman who trips up the stairs in such a beautiful gown only to laugh it off so well deserves something, I suppose.

    Nice to see Anne Hathaway get Best Supporting Actress and Les Mis has long been on my list of films to see.

    Can't recall who won Best Supporting Actor.  But can I say Christopher Plummer is still hot.

    That's all I can think of for now.

    Thanks for sharing your memories.  I, too, remember some of those moments.

     


    I have mixed feelings about Ben.

    He's a very smart guy...has good values...and works to put out a good product.

    But he's a mediocre actor at best. His friend Matt runs circles around him acting-wise.

    He should stay behind the camera.


    Peter, the more I see of Ben Affleck the more I like him.  Can't say much about his acting but he's a liberal and a humanitarian and I care more about that than about his thespian chops.


    Thanks for your rundown, Lis.  I loved the music, too.  And I loved that Anne Hathaway won, even though it appeared to be a shoo-in.


    Actually, when a very pregnant Eva Marie Saint won the Oscar for On The Waterfront, she raised eyebrows and got a huge laugh by declaring, "I may have the baby right here."  She gave birth two days later.  It was in January, 1961, at an untelevised, star-studded award ceremony, that Saint presented an award to a film student.  Jack Benny introduced her with a rambling, flowery, silly speech that prompted her to unload at the microphone, "After that, all I can say is, 'Oh, shit!'  It made headlines the following day.  A lot of people think that happened at the Oscars, but it didn't.  


    Oh, shit!  Why'd you have to go and burst my bubble like that?  Couldn't you have waited until I was six feet under before you came around and made me look like a ninny?  angry


    Hey, one little goof, it was still a great article!  I really enjoyed it.

     


    Well, yeah, okay.  smiley


    Olivier's speech and Voight's reaction here.  (Those were the days. . .)


    Latest Comments